Sadhana (Practice)

One may not reach the dawn save by the path of the night.

-- Kahlil Gibran

Life is full of celebrations and valleys... or so it seems. The celebration of a personal victory is always more sweet after a failure or defeat. The Winter Olympics are currently in full swing. Most of the Olympians have trained their entire life to get to this point... whether they are 16 or in their 20's, 30's, or 40's. They have dedicated their lives... and their parents have dedicated THEIR lives... to sport. I again return to the thought that it takes 10,000 times to practice a skill until the person becomes an expert. These Olympians are experts because not only have they practiced their skill 10,000 times... they have done it with the intention and heart to become excellent. But, if you think that they were successful each of those 10,000 or more times you have a warped sense of reality. The number of times these athletes failed out number the times that they were successful by... millions. Meaning, each time they hit the slopes, put on skates, or... ??? ... was only part of the practice. The preparation, the training, the visualization... that is also part of the 10,000 times. With visualization, athletes visualize their success... and sometimes their failures. Those athletes that visualize their failures are more likely to fail. Those athletes that visualize their successes, regardless of talent, are more likely to succeed.

What does all of this athlete talk have to do with "real-lifers"? We do the same things. The more that we visualize our success the more likely the chance of success actually happening.This is especially important to do while in a slump, a valley, a bad day. I have visualized the day that I would come out of the darkness. The day that the dawn would appear and the sun would shine. What I didn't realize is that we create our own dawn and we choose when it will happen. Like an athlete, I have practiced creating my dawn. My practice has been over the past 5 years. I have had successes and failures. As I continue to practice and visualize my successes consistently outweigh my failures. I remember the day that I opened the curtains in the house... that was my first success. The day I decided I had what I needed to be successful on my own... another success and a huge celebration. The day that I decided to open up and have friends help me... another massive success. The day that I took responsibility for my happiness... JOY. The day that I signed up for Yoga Teacher Training... not only successful but an amazing celebration. The day that I graduated and received my certificate... fabulous! Today I was asked to teach a class at my studio...and I am so proud of the journey that I took to get to this place, here and now. I have not been alone on the journey. People that surrounded me with love, nudged me forward, that supported me when I thought I would crumble, that listened to me and the drama... woke me up early and told me the truth... I love you all!

One may not reach the dawn save by the path of the night. The path of night is how we learn, how we grow, how we become aware, how we start to FEEL. Yoga is a way to move from thinking into feeling. It is a tool that helps navigate the darkness of night. On the mat, each morning, is where I continually learn to feel. I continue to use the tools provided within this ancient practice and move forward with love... into the light. NAMASTE - I bow to you. The light within me honors the light within you.

Being of Service

I never really understood what it meant to "be of service." I always thought that there would need to be a grand gesture of going to Aftica on a Mission trip or doing something else equally extraordinary. I never realized that I could be of service just where I am. The part I was missing is that I really don't need to concentrate on what I am going to do in the service area. I needed to change my perception to always think "How can I help?"

I work at a very large company with layers upon layers of organizational structure. I inhabit a cube that is famous for housing the only Gaiam Ball Chair in the company - with the possible exception of the fitness center. All of the walls are tan and the cube fabric is beige. I lovingly call this place beige-land. 

I have been wondering for a while now what my purpose is in this place. I have had the feeling that there was a larger reason that I was in that role at that organization and I needed to wait for the answer. The waiting is difficult, searching for clues to a purpose in beige-land. The work became monotonous, boring, stale. Tasks become de-motivating and repetitious. Some people love jobs like this... I do not thrive in this environment.


As I have been patiently asking for guidance, messages from different areas pacified my antsi-ness. It started one Sunday, before what turned out to be an incredibly sweaty yoga class, my teacher (Marlene) said, "Remember... you are right where you need to be at this moment." She has probably said this many times over, this was just the first time I heard it. Then she proceeded to put together a series of poses that were challenging and completely inspiring.


Another Sunday, again after Marlene's class, I was grocery shopping and quite literally ran into the card rack and was faced with a card that said, "Do what you can, where you are, with what you have!" (Teddy Roosevelt) This quote helped as I was attempting to sell a house in an incredibly low market, then realizing that I was not going to find a new house with the quality I wanted within my budget. This quote was more of a mantra during this period in time

The message that brought the pieces together for me was during Teacher Training. Rolf gave a dharma talk that I could grab onto. He talked about a previous job where he seemed to be in constant conflict with his boss. After a while of being in conflict he finally changed his mode of thinking to "How can I help." One day he walked into his bosses office and, instead of arguing against his bosses idea, asked that question; "How can I help?" This changed the dynamic of his relationship with his boss... to the point that he attended Rolf's wedding.


I realized I needed to take these three items and blend them into a mode of operation that is completely selfless and focused on the greater good. In addition, I wanted to be mindful of how I utilized it... over-using it could cause me not to follow through on other "How can I help you?" commitments. I started to use this as I walked through the halls, met with my team, interact with my boss(es). Then I noticed things start to change. Not only for me, but around me. People became more focused on how they can help others. At the end of last year I was assigned a new role that allowed me to put this to the test. Incredibly, I have noticed that the people not looking to help others but only out to help themselves are being asked to either change or find a new activity. I have noticed the use of the word "Mindful" in sentences and to describe work. The best part is; I am seeing change in the organization that gives me hope.

This action is what it means to "BE of service." Always being in the mode of "How can I help?" is beneficial to everyone